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Tips for Establishing the Right Tone

July 5, 2006

"The negotiating environment can affect the level of tension and openness that prevails.  If you're interested in lowering tension and seeking collaborative discussion follow these tips:

• Never underestimate the value of 'breaking bread.' In practically every culture, breaking bread is a bonding ritual.  So have coffee, soft drinks, and light snacks available.
• Use small talk at the beginning to dispel tension, lower people's natural defenses, and begin the process of building relationships.  Even in a win-lose negotiation, small talk helps the different sides know each other better and gauge each other's truthfulness.  It may also loosen people up to the point of seeking value-creating opportunities.
• Learn from what the small talk reveals about the other negotiator's style and manner.
• If the other side is very formal, don't speak too casually - they may interpret this as a lack of seriousness on your part.  If the other side is decidedly informal, speak more in a casual way, perhaps using metaphors with which they are comfortable (Harvard Business Essentials, 2003, p. 48),"

Reference:  Harvard Business Essentials: negotiation.  2003.  Boston:  Harvard Business School Publishing Corporation.

Harvard Business Essentials: Negotiation is available on loan from the Ohio State University Leadership Center.  To borrow this resource or any other resource, please go to the resource search page http://164.107.48.88/winnebago/index.asp?lib=???

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Created: 2008-04-01, Updated: 2009-04-30