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"You don't have to be hemmed in by limiting beliefs. You can exchange them for liberating truths. I'd like to suggest a simple six-step process to help you do that.
First, recognize the limiting belief. If a belief reflects black-and-white thinking, it might be a limiting belief. Same thing if it's personalizing, catastrophizing, or universalizing. Whatever the content of the belief, no matter how true it seems, it's important to recognize that it's just an opinion about reality - and there's a good shot it's wrong.
Second, record the belief. Let's be honest. It could be anything. We all have our own challenges.
Third, review the belief. Start by evaluating whether the belief is empowering. Try to look at it objectively. Is it enabling you to accomplish the outcomes you want, or is it preventing you from doing so?
Fourth, reject or reframe the belief. If a limiting belief is false, you can simply reject it.
Reframing is a bit more involved. Many limiting beliefs have a kernel of truth in them. That's what makes them convincing. But they're not the whole truth. If a limiting belief is true or partly true, you don't have to settle for it. You can always recast the story.
Fifth, revise the belief. This is where it gets interesting. I'm not talking about simple affirmations, though those can be helpful and have their place. I'm talking about reorienting your thinking around a new and liberating truth.
Sixth and finally, reorient yourself to the new belief. Start living from the perspective of this new, liberating truth. You might not fully buy into it. That's fine. Try it on. It may feel awkward at first, like putting on a coat that's too big. But if you keep telling yourself the truth, it will eventually fit, and you'll get more comfortable with it (p. 74-79)."
Please share how you have revised your beliefs.
From: Hyatt, M. (2018). Your best year ever: a 5-step plan for achieving your most important goals. Grand Rapids, MI: Baker Books.
"It all comes down to caring. If you don't love, you don't care, and if you don't care, you won't make the time to unite, communicate, encourage, connect, commit, serve, or sacrifice. Positive leaders care about the people they lead. They care about their team and organization. They care about changing the world because they know the world needs changing. Because they care, they do more, give more, encourage more, help more, guide more, mentor more, develop more, build more, and ultimately accomplish more. If I had a dollar for every time I heard the saying, 'People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care,' I would be rich. But the reason why people say it so much is because it's true. When you care about someone, they know it and feel it. And when they know you care about them, they will care about you and follow you with loyalty and passion (p. 180-181)."
How do you demonstrate to others that you care about them?
From: Gordon, J. (2017). The power of positive leadership: how and why positive leaders transform teams and organizations and change the world. Hoboken, NJ: Wiley and Sons.
"Cultivating identification with others at work in ways that will fuel empathy and compassion requires being available, both physically and psychologically. Availability becomes real in organizations through simple gestures such as keeping one's door open, arriving early for a meeting, holding online office hours for distributed teams, or lingering in a kitchen or break room to be around others. Any of these small acts to make ourselves accessible opens the space for connection and mutual engagement that is a powerful form of care.
Leaders who convey psychological presence with others in the organization are often described as great leaders who can command loyalty and commitment. And in the hyperconnected technological world of work, physical and psychological presence becomes a deeply meaningful gesture. Turning off the cell phone to be with someone is a move toward identification and empathy. Opening the door to another person's experience and shutting off the email is another (p. 127-128)."
What are some ways that you show that you are physically and psychologically available?
From: Worline, M.C., & Dutton, J.E. (2017). Awakening compassion at work. Oakland CA: Berrett-Koehler Publishers, Inc.
Tags: identity, leaders, leadership