Relationship Building as A Behavior Exhibited by Effective Mentors

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Thursday, November 10th, 2022

Effective mentors are not passive relationship builders, but rather make mentee relationship building an explicit priority. Our best mentors are servant leaders in the way that performance, or occupational objectives, are second to building a legitimate connection with the mentee. [1] A mentor of mine, Minister Aaron from the South Side of Columbus, builds a relationship with me as we spend an equivalent amount of time talking about my personal and career interests. Min. Aaron is a high efficacy example of a mentor because in addition to showing his authentic leadership, he now has pivotal information that can be used when giving future career directions. Think about how our friends can take the role of a mentor when we ask for advice on a topic of common interest. Friends are more equipped to give well-rounded advice because they are aware of our well-rounded self and it’s because of an existing relationship. The same goes for our mentors. Even if the mentor and mentee are not “close friends”, mentee growth is maximized when a mentor makes a legitimate effort to build a relationship with the mentee in question. [2] 

Effective mentors typically have a higher sense of emotional intelligence and are looking to serve the needs of the mentee before their own. [3][4] Moreover, mentors should have a greater focus on the well-being of the mentee. Not just in the sense of well-being in career, but also psychological and physical well-being. Anyone with a greater sense of emotional intelligence will know that individuals such as mentees will not see progress if they are simply “unwell”. A mentor can improve mentee well-being by building a healthy relationship and including comfortable personal subjects and questions into the regularly scheduled dialogue. [1] In fact, this should be a priority, as an increased sense of well-being is an outcome for both mentee and mentor. [5] 

The point: build a relationship with mentees and find mentors to build a relationship with.  

References 

[1] Firzly, N., Chamandy, M., Pelletier, L., & Lagacé, M. (2021). An examination of mentors’ interpersonal behaviors and mentees’ motivation, turnover intentions, engagement, and well-being. Journal of Career Development, 089484532110392. https://doi.org/10.1177/08948453211039286 

[2]Younginer, S. T., & Elledge, L. C. (2021). Mentor personality and attachment as correlates of youth mentoring relationship quality within a school‐based mentoring intervention: The moderating role of negative interactions. Journal of Community Psychology, 49(7), 2569–2589. https://doi.org/10.1002/jcop.22654 

[3] Jenkins, S. (2013). David Clutterbuck, mentoring and coaching. International Journal of Sports Science & Coaching, 8(1), 139–153 

[4] David Clutterbuck. (2005). Establishing And Maintaining Mentoring Relationships: An Overview Of Mentor And Mentee Competencies. SA Journal of Human Resource Management, 3(3). https://doi-org.proxy.lib.ohio-state.edu/10.4102/sajhrm.v3i3.70 

[5] Elce, Y. (2021). The mentor-mentee relationship, addressing challenges in veterinary medicine together. Veterinary Clinics of North America: Small Animal Practice, 51(5), 1099–1109. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.cvsm.2021.04.023 

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Thu, 11/10/2022 - 5:00am -- Anonymous

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